-
RSS Follow Become a Fan

Delivered by FeedBurner


Categories

abuse
abused
blessed
childhood
family
moested, molestation, victim, survivor
molestation
molested
parenting
sexual abuse
speak up
suicide
suicide, sexual abuse, molested, molestation, survivor, victim, change, motivation
survivor
taboo
victim
victims
powered by

Survivor's

Eve

Hi Luv,

so I wasn't too sure how to start but I figured I would share my coming out story. At the time that I wanted to come out I wanted to do it right (right for me). I was 20 yrs old and in a serious relationship, and I always told my girlfriend (at the time) that if I had a ring or anything that raised questions I would just come out. I've always been private about my relationships but I would never deny them.  When the time came, my girlfriend bought me a ring with our initials on it. My plan was to take my mother to dinner and talk to her about it. I remember telling my mother over the phone that I wanted to take her to dinner to talk, she was angry and questioning it. I was honestly caught off guard by her anger towards my invitation but then again looking at it now. I see she knew all along that I was a lesbian, she was just trying to avoid the whole conversation. When the day came to take her to dinner, I was at work. I worked at a Bally Total Fitness and my mother was working out. That day I was working in the Day Care center, I will never forget the look on my mothers face when she marched into the room. She was so angry and she kept asking me what it was, I needed to talk about. At some point she began yelling at me and I was just shocked. She yelled at me saying; what is it? Why dinner?? What is it?? Your gay??? You think that's nice?? I was so upset that she would take that moment away from me. All I can say is YES IM LESBIAN... As soon as I said it she stormed out, I remember crying watching her leave. But I couldn't go after her since I was at work. The following days living with my mother was hard, she would tell me I was disgusting everyday. She even told me that she rather I was on drugs or pregnant then be a lesbian. I was crying everyday, I ended up staying at my girlfriends place for a week just to avoid my mother. At the time I worked full time and I was in college as a full time student so I didn't want to lose my focus. After being gone for a week I went home, my mother was waiting for me in the living room sitting in the couch. She told me we needed to talk. I remember seeing my older brother with his son in the bedroom. I just sat down and listened to her, she was angry and told me I can't keep disrespecting her. That if I live there I am to go to work and go to school and go straight home. That to be her daughter I can not be a lesbian and if I couldn't go by her rules. She would change the locks, I will have to leave and I will no longer be her daughter. So as defeated as I felt I told her I was saving money and that I plan to move out the following weeks. The next thing I know she was yelling and I saw her getting up to leave. Instead she got up and attacked me with a knife, all I can remember was my arms and my face burning. I was kicking her off me and screaming. Some how my older brother came out, and I felt like was going to be saved but instead he held my arms down while my mother attacked me. It was the biggest betrayal I ever faced and when it was all done, I called my girlfriend and cried. I couldn't even talk I was in shock. My arms were cut up and everything burned. I left with the clothes on my back and I just threw a hoodie on to hide my arms. My girlfriend who lived in Bklyn paid a Cab to pick me up from the Bronx. I met up with her an hr later and I was still in shock. She looked so angry and heart broken. It took hrs for her to convince me to let her see what my mother had done. I cried taking off my hoodie, the cuts in my arms stuck to my hoodie b/c of the blood. My girlfriend and her mother took care of me. A few days later I was able to get the rest of my clothes, I moved in with my girlfriend. I lived with her for 2 yrs and for those 2 yrs, I didn't speak to my mother. Fast forward to today my mother and I had many conversations and not all have gone my way. We've both made a lot if efforts to repair our Mother/Daughter Relationship. I know today she is proud to have a lesbian daughter, and she's not afraid to tell me or anyone. I've come a long way in life and I know my past has made me the strong woman that I am today. I live my life on the open and I have so many things to be grateful for.

I hope this helps give you a little insight on my life... ✌️

Thank you,
E.V.

0 Comments to Eve:

Comments RSS

Add a Comment

Your Name:
Email Address: (Required)
Website:
Comment:
Make your text bigger, bold, italic and more with HTML tags. We'll show you how.
Post Comment
Website Builder provided by  Vistaprint